FORGET CUFFING SEASON
Hot girl summer, good girl autumn… why is it that with the changing seasons bring unrealistic expectations of our relationship status?? Comedian and youTuber Trey Kennedy does a skit titled “Girls in autumn be like…”, he says, “Not only are the leaves falling, but so are my standards.” As funny as this declaration is, there is some truth to it. With the warm weather seasons, we’re automatically expected to be promiscuous and single, if your not single looking cute in your bikini than your not doing summer right lol. Meanwhile when it cools down, we’re expected to quickly find a partner as if they’re the last one on the planet. Granted, corn mazes, ice skating, Christmas parties… all these seasonal festivities would be fun with a significant other right?!
I blame social media for these unrealistic expectations. We see photos of cute couple costumes at Halloween, adorable couples photos in front of the Christmas tree, and the inevitable kiss at midnight on New Years, these events/parties would all be nice with a boyfriend or girlfriend. Other expectations come from our non single friends and of course , our families. We’ve all been at the thanksgiving table when your Grandma says, “Your so pretty, why are you still single?” or “I want grand children before I die.”… but I think the highest expectations come from our own selves. Why is that we have to be “cuffed” or tied down during the holidays, because it’s fun or we’re suddenly lonely? Urban Dictionary defines cuffing season as the notion in which - fall and winter - seasons of prolonged colder weather and indoor activities, people become lonely and desperate to be cuffed.” But this is slightly different than how I think of cuffing season, I define it as more of the holidays in which cuffing season would end right after Valentine’s.
The science should also be discussed here. During the winter, serotonin levels are lower, which causes seasonal depression in many. It should also be noted that with the colder temps, it’s not hard to believe that cuddling and holding hands to keep warm can’t produce feelings of the need to be in a relationship. With science in mind, we can also blame propaganda. Companies and businesses promote cuffing season with online adds and television. They produce ads of ideal couples snuggling next to the fire, or the perfect gift to get your other half. Matter of fact, you never see ads of friends; society doesn’t push friendship on us, but love. These companies are basically telling us, if your not in a relationship during this season, than you must be lonely, sad or never leave the house… but this can’t be further from the truth.
With this cuffing season well underway, I propose as a millennial woman that we start thinking less in terms of relationship status and start promoting ourselves for our own achievements. You can be a smart, funny, and successful young individual that is 100% and completely single. Maybe it’s your choice to be single, you’re more focused on your friends, having fun, or building your career. Or maybe you want to find a relationship, but the expectations of cuffing season won’t allow you to lower your standards. For whatever the case may be, this holiday season I’ve tried to spend more of my time making memories with the people who are currently present in my life, my friends, and less time worrying about the ones who aren’t present. It would be nice to go on ice skating dates, get a kiss under the mistletoe… the list goes on and on (eyes rolling), but it’s meaningless unless it’s spent with someone you actually care about. This season I’m focusing on myself and my friends and if a great guy comes knocking at my door, I won’t be waiting but I’ll be hopefully optimistic!
